Going back home

First time think that going back home is such a great feelings....
Haha~ I can't sleep, wanna eat many food cooked by papa and mami....
I wish i can fly back by this time, without anything worries....XD
I know my life is hard right now, but i will try my best to earn more money when i step into the school and teach the pupils.... I want to make my family feel better unlike now...
I will say we still can survive in such this life but is hard....
not really poor or not enough, just not enough for me.....
I want better life, to realize all my dreams.... Yes to catch up my dreams...
1）i can go travel some places in my country, Malaysia...Yes I did it by going to Cameron, Genting, KL, Penang, Melaka and Johor, is enough already~
2) To travel to overseas, at least a country, maybe Singapore or Thailand....If can, I want to travel at Italy, Spain, and France, my dream countries....
3) Still travelling, but with my family.....
4) I can go for a concert, no matter who the presenter is...I think i can did it next year.
5) Go clubbing! Having fun....maybe i can do it this year....before it ends...
6）Dating~ I miss that moment....
7）can date with a guy maybe is an actor or any famous people (maybe will not realize)

Can get together with people i really love at the end,....
Wow, so many things have to be done, can i?

If i want~

If i want to go back home, i didn't need to hear others say about....I just go back, this is me....
Actually saying in hostel is also such a boring week for me, and i know it is study week.....
Actually in my schedule, there are no such a word "study" and i'm just telling the truth not lying.....
Maybe people will think i am lying in this case, but i really hate study!
Doing revision is such a boring thing, and i will choose to spend my time go to entertain myself....Don't you think so?
Is such a big deal for me....
I don't know what will happen to me after this semester....
People is getting closer and closer after a long period, but why i didn't think so? Even feel so? Like become further and further....Don't know how to say, maybe i should go back home and relaxing myself, now i don't even recognize who myself was....such a sad thing for me.....
Who am I? What i'm trying to do this one and a half year? Why i feel like i am wasting my time?
I am going to be a teacher on future....can i do that?
If i really can't do it, i will choose made myself fail in the exam....is good for me ........
But, i will think i have already spent one and a half year at here, and studying with nothing (i don't know why i still staying at here).....maybe i should try my best to do all these thing~ Sure i will become a good teacher....XD
I still thinking if i choose to continue my studies at Form Six, what will happen to me right now? Same as my friend? Fail??? Get a bad result? Fail in MUET?
I don't know....Maybe i should look forward....no choice....
Really suffering to pretend i'm okay studying at here....this is the truth....
I want go back.....Maybe just get something from my family, their support....

Still~

Tired~ But if didn't go out, what can i do? what i can eat? So many wh questions....
moody right now....headache and boring~~~
I want to think for something i can do to avoid myself being boring~~~
Why am i starting to think about many impossible things?
Can i just stop think about it for a second?
My God! Is that mean i am getting older and older? So i have started to think about my future? Or what?
Tired.......

still in love XD

one of my favorite JYJ's song... nice.... 10000 times like it XD
don't know why i always listening to JYJ's song.... Very nice and comfortable...Good job man for singing English songs....I like them soooo much!
Start looking forward to their concert next year! haha^^
I'm trying to find as if i can find their album, but i didn't so sad~ Maybe i shall go Hong Kong Video and search for it....wow....
Suddenly become big fans of them.....There are many more songs nice....like I can't soar, Ayyy Girl, Be the One, Found You, Empty, Be My Girl....and more XD
One more thing, maybe there will be the end of the world during year 2012, so i must do something so i won't feel regret all the years i had lived in this world.....I must try to realize all my hopes and dreams and all my family's dream....I will spend more time on them....
I can feel that.....God began to take the life of human slowly, step by step....start with some virus....then wars.....and natural disasters, accidents.....all happen non stop in our life.....So must appreciate all the things we had right now....Our family....
Suddenly i miss them sooo much.....Can i fly back home right now?

Everything is back XD

Glad to see my friends are fine again....XD
haha^^
Hope tomorrow we will have the happy moment...haha^^
haha^^

Maybe i should think of something good for me already XD
i just realized that if i can speak out all the things, that means i'm fine already...i'm still me.....haha^^ ignore me XD

Talking about an ideal guy, or an ideal boyfriend for me, suddenly i have such this thinking...haha^^
1) he must be handsome, for sure, but if not really handsome never mind (i am lying haha^^)....

2) i want he knows something about music, for example he knows to play some music instruments like guitar, piano, violin, just either of them...XD

3) no need too tall...but better he is taller than me....haha^^

4) He is a humor guy, and like to talk funny things and always make me laugh....
* important XD

5) He knew about sports news, and know to play some balls....(eg, basketball, badminton, football, tennis, motor racing.....etc) better know one of it...haha^^

6) He can sing....sing love song by playing music instrument....have a nice voice...and most importantly, he know about romance, and if he can surprise me anytime...XD I like it....

7) Dancing....know to dance....wow... break dance XD

8) I will totally fall in love with him....

9) sometimes he is cute...no need to pretend in front me...

10) No need to be so gentlemen... Just need to be mature enough... I hate some naive act^^

11) He cares about me, messaging me always...

12) If he can be like Nickhun from 2pm, kim jae joong (Hero) from JYJ, Junsu(Xiah) from JYJ......One characteristic of them....

13) He can protect me always.....

14) He has some value that i can cheer for him always....

15) He is a shining star....wow! that will be great!

Conclusion: 3 of them is the most ideal guy for me right now....i wish to have such a exciting journey of love...Sure it will be fun....
Almost perfect, but who suit it? haizzz..... My prince, when will you appear???

SAD MOMENT IN MY CLASS~

Everything is unexpected.....XD
i don't know why~ Something will happen suddenly, even we don't want it to happen....
Why? Why always at this time our class will have many problems?
Today i can see there are different atmosphere in the class, like it will be burst at anytime, this is what i am worrying about....
Actually i don't know what is really happening, i just heard it from other friends...

I want to find someone in my class to share something happen in my life....XD
Like i may fall in love...or i want to share some Korean music, but nobody cares,....
I know actually i'm not like someone important in class...
Without he/her, they just feel can't survive, that is what i think~
If i disappear by suddenly....nobody knows and nobody even cares...
Yes, i am always trying my best not to know anything....unless they tell me.....I know i am not worth to tell because my mouth can't keep any secret....yes, i admit it....haha^^
If i know something, i will try my best to help them who face problems.....
What must i do to help this class just be as when we just meet each other?
Something weird happen....even though someone closed to each other can be no longer good at anytime and i am worrying about it....

B 型女~

有你在的地方一定有欢笑，你善良，调皮，任性，霸道与贴心。你看起来活泼好动，但实际内心深处，你有些自卑而自负，你希望自己能把事情做到最好，你很在乎别人对你的评价，你的性格像小孩，单纯直接，情绪化，喜怒哀乐写在脸上，你没有心机，但也缺少些自我保护的能力，你表面看来很容易相处，但想要走进你的内心世界其实并不容易，你需要人家的鼓励，包容，宠爱和肯定，其实你也常常自我反省，你希望自己能做到起码80%的完美，但你似乎没那个毅力，所以你的情绪变化无常，一定是被这些因素困扰的。

今天的我要向大家介绍几首韩国歌。。。。超好听的。。。。。
2pm 的新歌~ ｉ＇ｌｌ　ｂｅ　ｔｈｅｒｅ～　
ｂｅａｓｔ～　Ｓｏｏｍ
Ｓｅ７ｅｎ～　Ｉ＇ｍ　Ｇｏｉｎｇ　Ｃｒａｚｙ
ＪＹＪ－Ａｙｙｙ　Ｇｉｒｌ
尤其是最后一首。。。超好听！
Ｘｉａｈ　Ｍｉｃｋｙ　Ｈｅｒｏ～好帅！

Adam Lambert

He is a good singer, but, due to people had convinced that he is a gay, he had lost in the final of American Idol.....He supposed to win that time, he had a good voice, powerful and i like his song soooo much....
Actually he is a gay or not really an important thing? I don't think so...
I found out there are still many people have such that narrow thinking....
He is coming to Malaysia for a concert and we as fans should cheer for him, and not criticize him because he is a gay...
Many people asking about his sexuality issue rather than listening to his song and shout for him....
I want to be one of the audience....But....I'm still in Ipoh....Attending classes.....
Hopes he can come again next time!

U smile, i smile

haha^^ Bieber's song again.... Nice^^
listening to this song while typing this article...
Actually because of boring, i have became active in some groups again...
When i read Ryan's wall which asking a question "Do you think that love at first sight is possible?".... Suddenly wanna do a survey to ask people's opinion, and that is what i get...
Is possible but it may not last longer....
Still can be said it is possible to last forever and never change the feelings....is a good feeling, but hard for people to experience it....
But there are also some of them always experience this kind of feelings. But for them, this kind of feel just a temporary feeling and cannot be last. This is what i said, maybe among all these people, there is someone who you really fall for....and i can be last forever....
Actually the probability for people to find true love at first sight is...0.00000001% ? or even worse.....
maybe i will start to do more research about that...and someday i will find my true love XD
sometimes really envious with people who always get together and closer to each other, people in relationship....
Someday i will get one, but when is it???
I hope it can happen earlier, before i am getting older and older~

sienzzzz~

人为什么那么自恋的，难道我一定是非你不行吗？神经病~什么时代了？
你不珍惜，我为什么要珍惜? 我才没那么笨~哈哈~
所以呢，女生也该理智点，别再为任何人要死要活的。。。。没用~ 没人会珍惜你的。。。。所以，提高自己，让自己变得更有价值，自然有更多人欣赏。。。。告诉他：“没你也行！还会更好！”
听到那些人自恋的说你还喜欢他，想念他！什么东西？为什么要想念你？
既然都有各自生活了，请放手。。。。
会是，更好的~
别让他觉得你很厌倦。。。。。

跟他chating 了~
哈哈~真爽~ 小弟弟~ 加油！

等到了。。。

终于等到了，千年一次的10.10.10 10:10 好开心~
觉得值得纪念咯。。。。
很不错的一天~

纪名浩~

这个人很厉害~他不是明星~ 不是什么出名的人~ 就是引到我的留意。。。
是面子书的一个朋友。。。。大我妹妹一岁~哈哈~
当然不是喜欢他，也不是产生什么兴趣，只是引到我注意咯。。。。
看名字就很特别了，我所认识的人应该只听过一个姓“纪”的。。。。
奇怪的姓。。。。
就是又特别加上特出。。。。这些是从他“状态”看出的。。。老实说，要在年纪轻轻就有一定的程度真的很难~
所以：佩服他！强中强，遇强更强。。。。跟其他州手没分别。。。不错~ 他是个热爱羽球的人。。。。应该很厉害吧！有潜能，又会游泳，跆拳道，会beat box。。。。难得一见。。。。哈哈~
就觉得人太厉害就开始觉得压力。。。可能吧。。。小小年纪就得承受那么多，真可怜，明明赢了，还是被讲，被批评。。。唉，幸好我不是压力中成长的，谢天谢地，谢谢爸妈从不给我压力，很好~

今天是十月十日一零年。。。。千年才见一次的。。。10.10.10...是值得纪念的，好多人选这一天，结婚，拍拖，和恋人或家人度过，还有，今天还是礼拜叻。。。。更特别，不知你们有没有在此时去喝亲戚的喜酒呢？
我呢，则是像普通一样度过，早上就去踢球（很明显，被逼的）， 然后买晚餐。。。。然后睡觉，发我的白马王子梦。。。。哈哈~
到现在，很闷，就上了面子书，写了那么多。。。哈哈~
等一下，会等10：10 10.10.10 的到来。。。。期待。。。。

Honestly

We don't know who are we behind ours.....like sometimes, somebody we knew well doesn't like what we think about, and sometimes betrayal can happen in anyplace, anytime, anyone around us....So, just say truly, have you ever hurt somebody accidentally?
Maybe you had, but you don't know it....
Like what we think right now, everything just nearly to be perfect~ Is that perfect will last long? How long? Forever? Non stop? There might have one day, one day which you will face the truth, nothing can last forever, even how sweet, how happy, how much you want... It can't...
Just ready to face the truth....Nothing can last forever, maybe you will not be the one get hurt...
Someone is play a fool! Just want to warn her that she is nothing~ Nobody will be sad without somebody, they will get a new person soon~
So, what you did, you will get what you will be paid~
Actually this is just caring about my friend, doesn't mean anything for me...
Just think sometimes, why does we be like that?
Don't know how to face the truth, not even when you really fall for someone....
Why not just try it? Everything also need a try before we know how it feels...
trying is just made you become stronger~ Not other means...
I always want to become a journalist, write about some articles, or books about me, my life, what i have faced, my own experiences, share everything with all the people...
So, i am always thinking about sometimes i may have became a famous writer, write something about our lives... and all the meaning of lives...
I will start by keeping update the blog... write my experiences...
Listening to music can make me feel better, i have more idea in writing...
Doing things right is my purpose....
And help to fix up all the bad things in my life, hope someone will appear soon to help me fix all those things....
My dream.....To live a simple life...with someone i love so much, and my beloved family and all the trustworthy friends....Hope i can get more than that....
Dreaming about can get a guy know what meant by romance....A guy can entertain me, can make me fall for him, do every stupid thing for him...
Even i don't meet anyone like this yet, i'm sure i can get one soon....By that time, i will not think about handsome guys, or like other guys appeared in front for me, this what we called destiny, my destiny, i hope it can as beauty as the wonderful story.....
Date with someone famous....Is what i always dream for~ Like other girls, simple~

Steamboat^^

Hope that i can make it~
i want to eat steamboat~ aim for it soooo much^^
tomorrow i will go to eat~ when i am thinking about this, i can't stop think about many delicious food in front of me....
OMG!!!!!!
Very hungry right now!

Gambateh^^

This is what i said to my sister, wei^^
Hope she can get a good result because i can see she put many effort on it, every time i go back i will see her studying Math, for her exam, and keep on asking me when she have something don't understand~
Hope it will help me get in a better class next year, i really hope so...
If can, hope she can surprise us one more time, like what she did in UPSR. Something good but unexpected...surprise^^
i think she can do it~
hardworking person will get something nice for them, and i'm not one of them, so am i deserve to get a better result? or what shall i do to make myself become someone can compete with other person?
If i really can do so, i should do it before, not now...because i know my future already, no matter what i do, what i work hard for, i am still a future teacher^^
No more forensic and no more journalist~
i get a pay back because i am not trying harder~

Hopeless,useless,speechless

i don't what is happening and it makes me very scared~
i don't know what to do right now~ what will happen soon? can somebody tell me?
i'm sick of this kind of life~ meaningless....i want something more~
Why i'm always the one gonna be sacrificed? i hate it!
Somemore, why when i'm coming back here everything bad will come around? i don't understand~
can somebody ensure my family will always safe and happy? i am very scared right now....
i need someone to hear what i am going to talk about....Without using suspicious eyes on me....Can you?
I get angry just now, i don't know what should i talk with him....even though i am regretting right now~
Is he really made me regret to do so? why he don't ever care about us? Can he spend more time on us? Stay at home please!
i'm sick of the day waiting for him to come back, worrying about him, scared something might happen to him...even i am afraid to answer the phone....i just keep calling and calling, can you don't make me worry about you?
My tears drop uncontrolled when i am typing this, is real~
i feel scared, i don't know what is gonna be happened soon...
i'm not angry of you, just worrying what happened to you, I am your daughter, i will try to help you even though i don't know whether i can help or not...
can you just stay away from such these thing? Get back to us please, don't ever made us worried about you~
very suffer to hide the feeling you know?
i have said that i will not go back anymore after this and i am wrong....
i will still coming back...even though every comeback made me sick and sad, and suffer....
i do all of this for us, our family~
Please don't go away~